...

Violate, anywhere anything
These, pictures-images
Make my head ring
Gaze, within-inside me
Hidden, beneath my skin
Rotting, cancerous lacerations
Twisting and jerking I

Vomit, blood-water-life
Vomit, flesh-senses-skin
Vomit, feelings-desires
Vomit, my soul from within

Poisoned, willful-I drank
Unfeeling, numbness-slowly creeping
Dying, darkness-embraced I sank
Desperate, seduction-violent seeping
In horror I, recoil, broken I

Vomit, blood-water-life
Vomit, flesh-sense-skin
Vomit, feelings-desires
Vomit, my soul from within

Postal Eloquence

Smeared black ink.

Your palms are sweaty,
and I'm barely listening
to last demands.
I'm staring at the asphalt wondering
"What's buried underneath where I am?"
(Where I am)

I'll wear my badge:
a vinyl sticker with big block letters
adhered to my chest.
It tells your new friends
"I am a visitor here... I am not permanent."
And the only thing keeping me dry is...

You seem so out of context,
in this gaudy apartment complex.
A stranger with your door key,
explaining that I'm just visiting.
And I am finally seeing
why I was the one worth leaving.
(I was the one worth leaving)

D.C. sleeps alone tonight.

(Where I am)
You seem so out of context
in this gaudy apartment complex.
(Where I am)
A stranger with your door key
explaining that I'm just visiting.
(Where I am)
And I am finally seeing
why I was the one worth leaving.
(I was the one worth leaving)

(Where I am)
The District sleeps alone tonight
after the bars turn out their lights.
(Where I am)
And send the autos swerving
into the loneliest evening.
(Where I am)
And I am finally seeing
why I was the one worth leaving.
I was the one worth leaving.
I was the one worth leaving.
I was the one worth leaving.

dance

When we gather together we make fun of ourselves. Not mean fun, or petty squabbling fun, but honest heartfelt fun. Keeps us from taking ourselves to seriously. Becauase we ARE serious. LIFE is serious. Perhaps its our way of whistling in the dark. I write alot of babel and crap on this thing, but I don't talk a whole lot about who I am. Thats cause I don't really know the answer to that question, and Im sort-of in the middle of finding some answers. Quite honsetly most of what I write is just free verse nonsense that runs through my head as I try to make sense of everything. Sometimes, I feel so deeply that I am able to put into words something that has meaning and significance to me beyond simply venting the feelings and images that constantly meander through my head like a heard of bored lemmings. I hope that more of such writtings will follow. That which lies below is another example of words running through my head, although the content is on track with how I am feeling right now. As much as it can be. I feel like a stranger in another persons life when I wake up in the morning. I haven't felt good about life in five years. I mean really good, as if I was doing what I needed to do with my life and could be happy in that knowledge. Whatever, who really cares anyway? We are all just lost out here trying to find our way.


These are my words, they are quite simple you will see, but don't believe me for a moment 'cause Im lying through my teeth
These are my words, I hope they make you loose control, forget the things you know you thought you had to be
I wonder now when they checked all the vital signs just how they missed this one alone and complete
My frozen self lies somewhere back there on a shelf as my heart searches for the meaning of "me"